Hearsay

HRC National Dinner, Lizard Lounge holiday, High Heel Race


Published on October 16, 2003, 12:00am | Comments

Hearsay joins the masses in saying goodbye to Liz…
A Liz of a different sort pumps up Sunday night…
The High Heel Race is coming soon…

It was a night of a thousand almost-stars and political once-weres at last Saturday's HRC National Dinner, better known as Lizziefest 2003. Held this year at the sparkling new Convention Center, the evening was one of gushing emotions and fond memories, as the faithful paid homage to departing Executive Director Elizabeth “I'm Doing It For the Children” Birch, who Hearsay will admit, in a rare moment of goopiness, has been one of our movement's more wondrous achievements. Hearsay was shocked to learn of the additional impending departure of David “I've Got A Secret” Smith, HRC's venerable Communications Director who, on more than one occasion, has lovingly remarked to Hearsay, “You can't go in there! No, wait, stop. SECURITY!” Everyone who is anyone (and everyone who thinks they're someone) was at the function, and Hearsay doesn't have time or space to name them all. But it would like to congratulate Whitman-Walker's Cornelius Baker on his well-deserved National Capital Area Leadership Award. Hearsay must also acknowledge the presence of Kathleen “Would You Like a Smear to Go with that Bagel?” DeBold, exalted high priestess of The Maunter Project, which, because it's an organization run by lesbians for lesbians, never gets mentioned in Hearsay. Well, now it's been mentioned, so Kathleen, you can now stop those harassing late-night, heavy breathing phone calls. Down from New York was Hearsay's other Sapphic chum Cathy “If These Lips Could Talk” Renna, who currently helms GLAAD's news media division. Hearsay slipped past security and into the cordoned-off media area where it snagged some face time with the three Queer Eyes guys before some creature with a shrill voice and a withering presence whisked them away. “I'm from People,” shrieked the creature, “and I was promised an exclusive.” Hearsay was dismayed to find that one celebrity, former pro-footballer and aspiring singing star Esera “Tiny Bubbles” Tuaolo, has gotten too big for his britches. Must be all the baby back ribs. The West Wing's Alison Janney, however, was positively fetching. Hearsay loves Ally almost as much as it loved Kate. Hearsay only has one gripe about the evening and it goes to whomever made the boneheaded decision to put the extraordinary Oleta Adams on stage during the salad course. Clink, clink, clink went the silverware as Adams gamely played her lovely piano set. Guess someone at HRC thought Oleta needed a little added percussion…

Hearsay heard that Club Five was its rowdy, randy self yet again Sunday night for its gay Holiday party, but Hearsay was too busy slithering around its favorite urban jungle, Lizard Lounge at Club MCCXXIII-LXIX, admiring one variety of reptile after another. So many beautiful lizards, all in one place -- and no two look alike. How do they do it? Just the man to ask: Croc-Monsieur Mark “Pining to be Michelle” Lee, who seemed a little fatigued, though still plenty chipper, toward the end of the evening. If you made it all the way up to the soothingly cool third level, you had the treat of seeing, and hearing, the exotic and rare blue iguana, otherwise known as DJ Jean-Philippe “Whee-Whee” Aviance. The Aviance iguana is best appreciated from the even rarer-to-snag shag beds running the length of one wall in the very white (décor-speaking, that is) room. But don't forget to tuck in the sheets before you leave. It was hard to abandon the sensual, French disco house sounds of the third level, but then it was equally hard to abandon the sexy, hard-thumpin' bass house of the first and second floors, where DJ Kostas bossed us in the key of Beyoncé. Neal “He's Got Bette Davis Eyes” Carnes never once left Kostas' dancefloor. His friend and housemate Warren “Marque” Marquez pointed out the goatee of one leapin' lizard. “I want one like that,” he said, with obvious double meaning. Lee-zerd, lee-zerd, it's gettin' hot in here…

And last but not least, for all those who keep writing Hearsay (at hearsay@metroweekly.com) asking WHEN IS THE 17TH STREET HIGH HEEL RACE? Hearsay finally has an answer: It's Tuesday, October 28, at 9 p.m. Be there in your finest spikes…


Call 202-638-6830 to advertise here in Marketplace