I have a roommate and she's a slob. I'm not a "Neat Freak," but I get tired of doing her dirty dishes left in the sink or, better yet, looking for the dishes she's left in her bedroom with her filthy clothes. (We won't even get into the bathroom problems.) What's a girl to do?
-- Unfriendly Maid
Put that Bitch out! You can communicate your unhappiness with the little hog, however I suspect that hers is a learned, hard-to-correct behavior. Do not put up with it. A Queen's home is her castle (in more ways than one), and when your personal haven becomes unpleasant and unwelcoming, it will affect the rest of your life in a similar fashion. And as dear Martha Stewart might say -- much as she must've when the feds started sniffing around her organic garden -- that's not a good thing.
I have a friend who likes to do drugs a lot and falls out in the bars, in front of everyone. The next day, she laughs it off, but I'm worried about her. What do I do?
-- A Concerned Party
I never said we were friends! Seriously though, you need to address the issue if it's that much of a concern to you. If she won't listen, the only thing you can do is remove yourself from the situation. Your absence from her life will make a very loud statement indeed.
My male boss keeps hitting on me. What do I do? I love my job and I don't want to lose it.
-- In a Pickle
Fuck him and get a raise! No, heavens no -- that's not what I meant to say. (Note to self: must...use...powers...for...good.) If it's a small business environment, take him aside, be calm, direct and non-threatening, and explain that even though he's a great boss -- did I mention that lying helps? -- it feels like he's been flirting with you and it's made you feel uncomfortable. If he has a lick of sense in him, that's all you need to say, and he'll apologize profusely and clean up his act immediately. If you're in a larger organization with a human resources department and written harassment policy, you should follow their procedures to the letter, which may preclude you from bringing this to his attention yourself.
Either way, if he's an asshole about it and makes your life miserable afterward -- a possibility you can't ignore, my little chicken nugget -- you'll have to face that life on the job ain't goin' to be rosy while he's around (which he won't be for long with the human resources muckety-mucks looking out for you), or while you're around (if you have to tackle this on your own and he won't budge).
It's a tough situation, sweetness, especially since you love your job. But even that doesn't make it worth it to ignore his crossing the line and doing the wrong thing to you. You deserve better.
The Dog Days of August don't have to be so dreadful if you have a friend to turn to for the advice you need. I, Lena Lett, am that friend. Turn to me. No -- over here, me. That's right, my little sunflower kernels. Write to email@example.com today.