Horoscope
September 22-28, 2011
Heavenly Round-Up: You’re whipping through your cycle of being and becoming. You’re running as fast as you can just to stay in place. You’re learning at a rate you’d have called impossible before you hit your zone. And you’re wondering how long you’ll retain your superhuman powers. Make that hay whilst the sun shines and don’t delay in your bettering and widening of self and interests. Once you’ve taught yourself to believe in yourself, the rest will be a piece of cake. Serve some to your loved ones.
Aries: You believe you’re not easy to fool, but that belief may not be supported by the facts. Your very sense of imperviousness makes chinks in your armor. Learn to find your own flaws, and you’ll be surprised by how quickly they diminish and how quickly you improve.
Taurus: Can you do the tango? No? But you have a remarkable sense of rhythm and terrific proprioception. Get on with allowing yourself to combine your innate capabilities and burgeoning interests into entirely new and improved versions of yourself. Measure twice.
Gemini: If you could do it without rocking the boat, you’d go for it in a heartbeat. But there’s so much at stake, and you can’t stand the idea of screwing everything up to go after that one missing piece of your heart. Try to imagine your life whole and without regrets.
Cancer: Are you the best of all possible yous? Could you train yourself into optimism? Not patient understanding. Not constant capacity. Not quiet acceptance. Actual, glass half-full, dyed-in-the-wool optimism? You might be surprised at the difference it could make.
Leo: You want it. And you want it badly enough to fight for it. You want it badly enough to make a scene over it. But do you want it enough that you could work, plan and develop in order to have earned it as well as taken it? Patience is a viable path here. Don’t be distracted.
Virgo: You’re the best resource you have available. Take a personal inventory and try to get a feel for what you’ve been leaving out, what you’ve forgotten, what you’ve stored in the closet of your subconscious and forgotten altogether. The solution lies within. Look again.
Libra: It wasn’t you. It wasn’t you. It may have looked like you, but it wasn’t. If you repeat this mantra often enough, someone somewhere may even believe you. Sadly, it may well have been you; albeit not you at your best. Get honest. Make amends. Find a better route.
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CAPRICORN AQUARIUS PISCES ARIES TAURUS GEMINI |
CANCER LEO VIRGO LIBRA SCORPIO SAGITTARIUS |
Scorpio: You wanted to, but you were running behind. Now what will you do to catch up? Have you got a genie in a bottle? Have you got a deus ex machina? Have you got a fairy godmother? Now more than ever you may wish to be your own supernatural solution.
Sagittarius: Neither here nor there is where you’ve hidden yourself. You’ve been under some pressure and you don’t find it comfortable, let alone tenable. All right. Can you relieve the pressure through your own efforts? Can you ask anyone else for a helping hand?
Capricorn: Look. Look, look, look. See what there is to be seen. Don’t make assumptions; you don’t have the time and you won’t benefit from the lazy way out of learning from your environment. You can do more with less, if you’ll only figure out what’s really on hand already.
Aquarius: Wouldn’t you just love to have it all sorted out? Wouldn’t you just love to have all the pieces of the puzzle, and them to fit together cleanly with practically no effort on your part? Too bad. You did get yourself into this one. And you really do have the skills to get out.
Pisces: It’s not what you thought it was when you got started. Is your disappointment clouding your vision? It might be even better than what you’d expected, but you’ll have to see with a different perspective to make any kind of an honest assessment. Trust yourself more.
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Horoscope
September 15-21, 2011
Heavenly Round-Up: There’s a pronounced degree of something you can only call lunacy going around like a late-summer flu. There’s this slightly off-kilter perspective through which the most innocent pronouncements come out sounding jaded and even lewd. There’s this disconnect between the realness of reality and the necessity of that which has been necessary. You could use these sea changes to re-examine what you’ve been taking for granted. You could focus this unusual lens to view those aspects of life so banal you’ve ceased to see them at all.
Aries: You’re waking up alleging you were duped. You’re going to sleep sure that you’ve been had. You’re wondering where to point the finger next so that fate doesn’t keep singling you out. But you might consider taking the heat, and warming to your condition. Ignite!
Taurus: Look around you. Where is your life absolutely at its best? Where would you like to see improvement? This is a good time to dream of the ideal life and begin to apply yourself to making your own dreams come true. Now is the time for enlightened self-interest.
Gemini: You’re under some scrutiny at work. Is it your fault you’re behind, scattered, in a jam and on the outs with the co-worker who would be most able to offer a viable assist? Maybe. Don’t try to shift the blame, take on the challenge of winning that cooperation.
Cancer: Is it your spirit, trampled and ailing, at the root of your condition? Would a new attitude be the best solution? Or are you satisfied with sulking and moaning? Really? Yes, it’s painful to get on with crafting a positive outlook. Yes, it really works better over time.
Leo: As you were, so will you be. And you were good enough then, so you’ll be back up to your personal par in no time. Stop kicking yourself for falling behind. Enlist the aid of the capable and interested and be more than ready to share the glory, accolades and bonuses.
Virgo: Time and tide slip by with frightening regularity and little vividness. What’s washed the color from your day-to-day undertakings? What’s caused you to pull into your shell and hide from the stream of life washing by you? Let go. Embrace the unknown with vigor.
Libra: How’ve you been lately? Are you overexposed to hostile germ fields? Are you washing your hands more than Lady Macbeth did? Are you checking your tongue for spots, streaks and coatings? Wouldn’t it be more sensible to get rest, eat right and manage stress?
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CAPRICORN AQUARIUS PISCES ARIES TAURUS GEMINI |
CANCER LEO VIRGO LIBRA SCORPIO SAGITTARIUS |
Scorpio: You usually know what you want and how you want it. You usually never have to consult with anyone on matters of taste. You usually are first in line to help yourself. What’s up? Have you lost your nerve? Find your way with an open heart and mind alike.
Sagittarius: If it were really fun and easy, everyone would be doing it. Instead, you’re pretending as hard as you can whilst you look over your shoulder nervously to see if all those merry half-truths are catching up to you yet. Tell the whole truth and take a load off.
Capricorn: Isn’t it great to have such amazing resources in your siblings and long-time cronies? Are you making the most of these connections? You could probably reach out and do yourself a major solid here. There’s a lot to do and not enough time, right?
Aquarius: It’s not your fault, okay? Now, get honest with yourself about your budget, your means and your spending habits. Do you need to find more work? Different work? Or a less costly lifestyle? Maybe a combination of these would be best for you.
Pisces: You can’t help those vivid dreams. They’re more real than real life, and you don’t want to wake up. Fair enough. Will you sleep through this chance to make those dreams come true? In one sense or another, you’re still the captain of your ship. Start steering.
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These are challenging times for news organizations. And yet it’s crucial we stay active and provide vital resources and information to both our local readers and the world. So won’t you please take a moment and consider supporting Metro Weekly with a membership? For as little as $5 a month, you can help ensure Metro Weekly magazine and MetroWeekly.com remain free, viable resources as we provide the best, most diverse, culturally-resonant LGBTQ coverage in both the D.C. region and around the world. Memberships come with exclusive perks and discounts, your own personal digital delivery of each week’s magazine (and an archive), access to our Member's Lounge when it launches this fall, and exclusive members-only items like Metro Weekly Membership Mugs and Tote Bags! Check out all our membership levels here and please join us today!
Horoscope
September 8-14, 2011
Heavenly Round-Up: You’re on the way. You’re growing into your potential. You’re exceeding expectations – yours and others. You’re all that and more. So take advantage of the felicitous times. Do your utmost. Make your play. Add to your net worth. Subtract from your attitude. Get with the program and get on with being. There’s hardly anything you could wish for you can’t make true, leaving aside the ”world peace” issue. Allow hope to expand your heart and peace to enliven your soul. Then make it happen.
Aries: You are as you were, but you’re the new, improved version of yourself. Trust in this enhanced edition of you. Make use of your newfound powers. Exploit your greater capacities. Create more difficult challenges so that you can push even your up-sized envelope.
Taurus: You’re in the groove and you’re not afraid to enjoy it. You’ve learned the hard lessons, now comes the extended skill set and amazing implementations. You’re ready to make the most of working with others and you’ll find you have more followers than you need.
Gemini: You have a way with words. Watch out that the words don’t have their way with you. Hew close to the grain of pure truth. Cleave to brevity and honesty as if your future depended upon it. And cling to your integrity through any change or shift in climate.
Cancer: Are things looking up, or have you simply rebooted your point of view? It might even be both. You could be on the other side of the hump that’s been impeding your access to happiness, contentment and general jollity. Don’t let anything get you down!
Leo: Look! Look! Look! See your future run! See it run toward you! Now what? Well, can you catch your hopes in your arms? Would you do better with a net? A really big net? Or a nice Rube Goldberg contraption? Think outside the box and your comfort zone.
Virgo: Simplify, simplify, simplify. This is your chance to clear, clean and de-clutter before you find yourself overwhelmed with all kinds of external stimuli. Refine your conditions and sweep the outmoded from your consideration. You can make it all work well.
Libra: The times are as they are. You can do your bit by refusing to be hemmed in by too much pure reason. Let yourself drift on a neap tide of luck, serendipity and outright good timing. Let yourself be encouraged by the daring-do of those who work without a net.
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CAPRICORN AQUARIUS PISCES ARIES TAURUS GEMINI |
CANCER LEO VIRGO LIBRA SCORPIO SAGITTARIUS |
Scorpio: You’re on the way. You just need to remember what to take with you, so that you’re not endlessly circling back to collect your necessaries. Build a checklist, engage a minder, hire an assistant. Do what it takes to dot your tees and cross your eyes.
Sagittarius: Be on the lookout for all good things as they come to pass. Because there’s every likelihood that they may. However, you’ll have to have your special goggles on (not those tacky beer goggles) to see the infinite becoming fortuitous right before you.
Capricorn: You could if you would. You tell yourself why not, but you don’t explain why. Is your cup always half empty lately? You could fill it beyond any doubt; clear to the brim if you choose. But you’d have to let go of your comfort level with having ”settled.” Could you?
Aquarius: It’s not as though this is a new idea. It’s not as though you hadn’t already worked out the pros, cons and maybes ages ago. It’s not as though you’re even remotely taken aback by the appearance of the opportunity. So get off your duff and get going ASAP!
Pisces: There’s a certain fullness to the times. Is it merely harvest in the air? Are you more than ready to reap as you’ve sown? Fear not, you’ve been a good little boy or girl. It’s definitely time to open the present and enjoy all it brings, as well as the future inherent in it.
Support Metro Weekly’s Journalism
These are challenging times for news organizations. And yet it’s crucial we stay active and provide vital resources and information to both our local readers and the world. So won’t you please take a moment and consider supporting Metro Weekly with a membership? For as little as $5 a month, you can help ensure Metro Weekly magazine and MetroWeekly.com remain free, viable resources as we provide the best, most diverse, culturally-resonant LGBTQ coverage in both the D.C. region and around the world. Memberships come with exclusive perks and discounts, your own personal digital delivery of each week’s magazine (and an archive), access to our Member's Lounge when it launches this fall, and exclusive members-only items like Metro Weekly Membership Mugs and Tote Bags! Check out all our membership levels here and please join us today!
