Horoscope
November 24-30, 2011
Heavenly Round-Up: You’ve circled the block on your tricycle so many times you’re getting mondo frequent rider miles stacked up. You’re torn between enthusiasm for the next little thing and appalling cynicism that you or anyone still cares enough to bother. You’re psyched for the kick-off of the holiday season, and dreading all the obligations you’ll be fulfilling, or choosing not to, at the last minute. Take a deep breath. Take a multi-vitamin. Take a bubble bath and a long nap. Use a calendar to plan through the New Year.
Aries: You’re on a roll, and you’re gaining momentum. Wouldn’t it be peachy if you didn’t find yourself possessed of a desire to know how to stop in case you want to get off? You’ll do just fine, come the day, but you do need a solid exit strategy. Consult.
Taurus: Looking around at the situation, you can either retreat or you can choose to reach out. Use collateral skills belonging to your cronies or partner. Use old techniques you’ve let fall by the way over time. It’s neither beneath you nor amateurish to be effective.
Gemini: If you can’t keep your hands in your pockets and you don’t know of a safe alternative (like a buddy to hold hands with in tempting circumstances), you may have to choose to get the heck out of Dodge, or stay the heck out of Dodge. Or rewrite the rules. Whichever.
Cancer: It wasn’t the first thing that crossed your mind. And it might not be the most germane at the end of the day. All the same, you want to snag that thought and begin to incubate it for all you’re worth. There’s a real gem in the dung-heap and you want in early!
Leo: It’s bigger, messier and not quite as much fun as you’d hoped. But you’ve given your whole heart to the endeavor and you will never give up whilst you have a say in the proceedings and resources to throw at the matter. Call up a Sagittarius to get the long range.
Virgo: You’re one of a kind, and you know it. You’re low-key, and you cultivate it. You’re ready to take off, and you’re not likely to let people know until it’s almost past the point of departure. You’ve got a grand adventure ahead of you. It’s a brand, new life phase!
Libra: Isn’t it delightful when people get together and have a real good time? Isn’t it charming when your acquaintance find their way to knowing each other better. Isn’t it surprising when folks turn out to be connected above and beyond your graces? Celebrate.
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CAPRICORN AQUARIUS PISCES ARIES TAURUS GEMINI |
CANCER LEO VIRGO LIBRA SCORPIO SAGITTARIUS |
Scorpio: However determined you may be (and you are), you may not have the entire resource set to go this one alone. You’re not good at reaching out for help. Could you inveigle investors instead? Could you seduce silent partners? Could you just do the research?
Sagittarius: Full of the good cheer of the season, you’re on a tear. You’re talking and you can’t find where they put the discretion override. You’re sharing, and you’re pretty clearly over-sharing. You’re acting like you don’t get out much. Slow down and think first.
Capricorn: You want to enjoy the holiday but you’ve got beef with the location, the guest list and the menu. You’re less than thrilled with your cohorts in attendance and you don’t like the timeline for the festivities either. Get it off your chest, then shut your mouth.
Aquarius: Welcome to the fun house. Nothing you can see is quite where it should be. Everything you see is somewhat distorted. Can these oddities work in your favor? Are you capable of applying your astounding capacity for logic to the puzzle before you?
Pisces: Walk the line. Walk the talk. Walk out the door. Walk a mile in someone else’s shoes. But do get moving. You have a ways to go and the journey of ten thousand miles begins with a single step. You’ve got the motivation. You have an internal map. Walk.
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Horoscope
November 17-23 2011
Heavenly Round-Up: Are you awakening from a long dream? Or are you falling back into a semi-grounded fugue state? Retain your self-awareness as you progress through this cycle. Pay attention to how you feel, what inspires you, how your body is responding and what the logical necessities and implications are for your assessment. You can go the distance and further, but you’ll need to take your desires, both hidden and expressed, and put them foremost in your mind as you proceed. Wear burgundy for luck. Drink burgundy for health.
Aries: Once you’ve been there and done that, are you ready to ascend to the judging table, or would you prefer to leave the table with your honor and impartiality unimpaired and intact? You have sticky ethical questions in front of you. Leo has your back.
Taurus: You’re the best in your class. You’re capable, and recognized both for your devotion and your charm. You’re in with a chance, but you’re going to want to revisit your long-term goals with an eye to seeing if they still match the person into whom you’re evolving.
Gemini: You’ve taken that walk on the wild side, and it was fun. You’ve come back from the edge, but you’re not still breathless. You’ve looked to the future and you have a long way to go to get to where you want to be in your heart of hearts. Call the shots Friday.
Cancer: It wouldn’t be the first time in the world things didn’t turn out as you’d planned. It won’t be the last time in your life you find you have more to do and less to do it with than you’d anticipated. But you will triumph, using your feat of non-linear problem solving.
Leo: Once, before you’d gone so far down this road, you had a different perspective. Can you recall the visions you used to cherish? Can you return your heart and mind to your former point of view? You’ve lost something vital along the way; it can still be recovered gracefully.
Virgo: Happenstance happens. Sometimes being in the right place at the right time is the best we can bring to any situation. Your innate sense of rhythm will bring you through the rough patch ahead of you and into the light of accomplishment and recognition.
Libra: You’re smart, talented, kind and thinking outside the box. You can hardly ask more of yourself than you already have. And yet, and yet, you’re not all the way home just yet. You can reach a little farther and come back with so much more. Be brave Sunday.
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CAPRICORN AQUARIUS PISCES ARIES TAURUS GEMINI |
CANCER LEO VIRGO LIBRA SCORPIO SAGITTARIUS |
Scorpio: This is your time to shine. This is your time to take it on the chin. This is your time to make the most of your life. This is your time to reach back and repair the rents in your soul. This is your time to plan the future. This is your time to be in the moment.
Sagittarius: Is it all contumely? Or did you have some of that coming to you? You may not always be the most sensitive observer of the situation as it occurs, so check in early and often with your cronies and even a disinterested person or two to get the picture.
Capricorn: It’s the beginning of a new era in your life. Your chickens have come home to roost, and they’re ready to travel with you into the future you’ve only just begun to realize is possible. Get your ducks in a row and you’ll be sitting in the catbird seat Monday.
Aquarius: You can see clearly now, the haze is gone. You can see more than the obstacles in your way, you can also see the work-arounds. You’ve got the best of all possible views, but you’re going to have to act and act quickly to make your dreams come true.
Pisces: It’s the outcome, sweetie. Focus on the results you want. Focus on the resources you need to get there. Focus on the personnel who can give you the access you require to make it all manifest. You’re on the edge of greatness, but you must follow through.
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Horoscope
November 10-16, 2011
Heavenly Round-Up: If you were in the right place at the right time with the right resources at your command, what couldn’t you do? If you were able to simultaneously hold, increase and improve your ground, how far ahead of the curve would you be? If you were able to harness your desires to the natural world to make your dreams come true, where would your ambition take you? Get on task. Get on the ball. Get with the program and get yourself that much closer to happily ever after.
Aries: If you’re bound and determined to take it so far that you have no choice but to jump the shark, fine. Do it with panache. Do it for an audience. And do it with your whole heart. You may find you’ve gone a shark too far. Equally, you may discover you have sharks to go.
Taurus: If life were a symphony, which instrument would you be? If life were musical, which line would you sing? If life were a picnic, which sandwich would best represent you? It’s time to get a little less practical in order to find the best of all possible outcomes.
Gemini: You’re between the devil and the deep blue sea. Happily, you’re not as anxious as you might be – possibly because you’ve managed to convince yourself it’s not as dangerous as it seems from where you’re standing. Watch where you put your feet on Tuesday.
Cancer: You could spiral in that holding pattern for far longer than you’ve envisioned. Or you could think outside the patterning so you have enough perspective to implement a different set of criteria all together. You’re good enough. You’re smart enough.
Leo: Infamy is a strong word. Integrity is another word carrying lots of weight. You may find you’re not well understood in your choices. You may find others disagree, to the point of violence, with where you’re headed. You may find you have the backbone to follow through.
Virgo: It wasn’t in the cards. Or maybe it was the stars. Or it could have been the writing on the wall. But the good news is you didn’t really want that other outcome anyway. In fact, the conclusion is going to be better than a cliff-hanging soap-opera wedding. Stay real.
Libra: How have you made it this far without having more flak stick to you than that? How have you tumbled down without being covered in the muck? How have you associated yourself with such radical concepts and yet retained your mild-mannered persona? Think.
Scorpio: You’re a magnet for trouble. You thrive in a fraught environment. You’re at your best when your back is against the wall and you’re running out of ammo. Did you create this crisis to give yourself a better platform for your responsiveness? Unintentionally then?
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CAPRICORN AQUARIUS PISCES ARIES TAURUS GEMINI |
CANCER LEO VIRGO LIBRA SCORPIO SAGITTARIUS |
Sagittarius: Like a bull in a china shop, you can’t stop breaking up the delicates. You wouldn’t hurt a fly on purpose, but you’ve gotten to the point where there’s just not enough room for you to swing your elbows while being yourself. Find a larger paradigm Sunday.
Capricorn: It wasn’t the bee’s knees, but you liked it well enough. In fact, you’re wondering if it might not get better over time and with diligent application. You may be onto something. Is it worth the struggle? Is it worth the adjustment? Is it worth taking a huge risk? Believe.
Aquarius: You’re afflicted with perfect hindsight. You’re in the thrall of all those tired maxims shoved down your throat when you were just a wee sprog. You’re operating from an outdated platform. You’re not doing yourself any favors either. Let go of the creeping past.
Pisces: How could you forget? How could you drop the ball? How could you space out? Well, it’s understood that you’ve been busy on a number of fronts. It’s comprehensible that you’re overwhelmed. It’s in the realm of possibility that there’s even forgiveness. Get some.
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These are challenging times for news organizations. And yet it’s crucial we stay active and provide vital resources and information to both our local readers and the world. So won’t you please take a moment and consider supporting Metro Weekly with a membership? For as little as $5 a month, you can help ensure Metro Weekly magazine and MetroWeekly.com remain free, viable resources as we provide the best, most diverse, culturally-resonant LGBTQ coverage in both the D.C. region and around the world. Memberships come with exclusive perks and discounts, your own personal digital delivery of each week’s magazine (and an archive), access to our Member's Lounge when it launches this fall, and exclusive members-only items like Metro Weekly Membership Mugs and Tote Bags! Check out all our membership levels here and please join us today!
Horoscope
November 3-9, 2011
Heavenly Round-Up: Something unexpected has turned up. Is it throwing a monkey wrench in the works? Is it a call to establish a new paradigm? Is it reasonable to believe it’s the fruit of your own unwitting labors? There’s been a lot of water under the bridge. You’ll find more profit in looking forward than post-mortem’ing backward. While persuasion is more effective, cold logic is more efficient. You’ll have to decide where you want to draw that line. Look over your left shoulder Saturday for an interesting twist in current affairs.
Aries: Once upon a time you were without stain or blot upon your character. Your conduct was above reproach. Situational ethics have driven you far from your point of origin. Is this who you want to be? Is this how you prefer to behave? You have choices to make.
Taurus: You’re as dedicated as they come. You’re as interested as anyone. You’re as ready to pitch in as they come. And you’re wondering how more and more falls to your lot no matter how busy you already are. It’s an unintended consequence of your proficiency. Dream deep.
Gemini: It wasn’t the sushi you ate. You had that late-night revelation because it’s your turn. The vision is your gift, and possibly a curse. You can’t un-ring the bell on this one. Now is the time to evolve to meet the greater challenge you’ve envisioned for yourself. Ask Aquarius.
Cancer: There was a place for you, but now it seems to be evaporating despite your sincere efforts and brave endeavors. Is this only your fears talking, or is there some truth to your possibly dire analysis? You’d do well to bounce your concerns off a centered, savvy crony.
Leo: You’ve been at it for a goodly while. And all you can see is the mountain of technological claptrap rising endlessly before you. Is this a dystopian dream? Is this a self-inflicted sentence? Is this a test of your purity of heart? Could it be all of those and more? Wear silk.
Virgo: Pensive is as pensive does. If you’re spending too much time in your head second-guessing yourself and spinning your wheels, it may be time to get out and move. You’d do yourself a favor to get a regular venue in which you could dance with wild abandon. Go early.
Libra: You’re one of a kind and you’re good at it. At the same time, you want to fit in and find an unobtrusive method for living both justly and comfortably. You might be surprised to hear how difficult the philosophers and saints found your simple desire in application.
Scorpio: Nothing easy or simple is worth having, you tell yourself. Too bad you’re not right. Granted, it’s your sour grapes speaking. You worked yourself into this corner, and you’ll fly with the angels if necessary to get yourself out of it. The solution is near and possible.
Sagittarius: You’re no better than you ought to be, but your standards are higher, perhaps, than you’ve been given credit for. Pat yourself on the back for 15 seconds. Now get busy making even more ambitious plans to make the most of your resources and environs.
Capricorn: Would you really? Even if time travel were possible, and the cost not prohibitive, you probably wouldn’t want to change the outcome in the present tense. You’ve gained too much valuable expertise and experience from the events in question. Rejoice early.
Aquarius: Look into the mirror. You’re there. You exist. Stop with the vague pouting and get on with increasing your positive visibility. You have more to give than you can remember easily. You have more to do than time with which to see it all done. Gird up your loins.
Pisces: Persistence in the face of uncertainty is one of your best qualities. Don’t let it go. Don’t walk away from the challenge in front of you. You have the presence of awareness to see around corners and through obstacles. Use your superpowers for your own good.
Support Metro Weekly’s Journalism
These are challenging times for news organizations. And yet it’s crucial we stay active and provide vital resources and information to both our local readers and the world. So won’t you please take a moment and consider supporting Metro Weekly with a membership? For as little as $5 a month, you can help ensure Metro Weekly magazine and MetroWeekly.com remain free, viable resources as we provide the best, most diverse, culturally-resonant LGBTQ coverage in both the D.C. region and around the world. Memberships come with exclusive perks and discounts, your own personal digital delivery of each week’s magazine (and an archive), access to our Member's Lounge when it launches this fall, and exclusive members-only items like Metro Weekly Membership Mugs and Tote Bags! Check out all our membership levels here and please join us today!
