Metro Weekly

Elijah

Elijah's up for hardcore rock climbing and would splurge endlessly on frozen yogurt if given the chance

He might not have the doctor title just yet, but Elijah, 28, should be just months away from that anthropology Ph.D. But who wouldn’t expect great things from Elijah? Not only is he smart, but he has a self-reliance that’s been blooming since he dropped out of his Fairfax high school junior year, after helping to found their Gay-Straight Alliance. ”I had a lot of issues with bullying. I dropped out, moved out, got a couple of fulltime retail jobs.” Today, that self-reliance has taken a community tack, leading Elijah to activism, particularly with the DC Trans Coalition and Helping Individual Prostitutes Survive (HIPS). With all that going on, he still manages to make time for his rabbit, Buster, and his partner, in their Columbia Heights home.

What’s on your nightstand?
A lamp. Really random shit. A sewing kit, a calendar, a cup of water.

Coverboy: Elijah

Coverboy: Elijah

What’s in your nightstand drawer?
There’s no drawer. My partner got it from Craig’s List for free.

Where do you keep condoms and lube?
Because of my work with HIPS, I think I have a bucket of condoms. Because of the outreach work, I make an effort to try them. ”This condom works this way….” I have probably 50 or 60 condoms. We have every barrier you can imagine.

What was your favorite cartoon when you were a kid?
Jem and the Holograms. It was hilarious. But I hated cartoons. I would watch a lot of horror movies.

Who’s your greatest influence?
In D.C., some activists who’ve been at this for 20 or 30 years are the most inspiring people who exist. They not only face adversity, but work against it.

What’s your greatest fear?
People giving up. A sense of hopelessness.

How would you describe your dream guy?
Someone who is selfless, committed, caring, generous, a critical thinker.

And physically?
The guys who go to the Eagle are probably more my type than the clean-cut, clean-shaven.

Define good in bed.
When all parties felt they pushed boundaries – if they wanted to push boundaries – in a way that they all felt good.

Who should star in a movie about your life?
Elijah Wood. If you Google my name, he sometimes pops up. Seems like a good go-to guy.

Who was your first celebrity crush?
Kurt Cobain. At 12, 13, I thought he was the ”awesome-est.”

Who gets on your nerves?
Anyone who is unwilling to think critically about their own place in this world. I think that’s the source of all our problems.

What’s your biggest turn-on?
Probably creativity.

What’s your biggest turn-off?
Selfish recklessness. Guys who are more than willing to bareback without any kind of responsibility to other people or even to themselves.

What’s something you’ve always wanted to do but haven’t yet tried?
Hardcore rock climbing.

What’s something you’ve tried that you never want to do again?
Getting a Ph.D. It’s six years of only one thing. You start at year zero think you know a lot, but not everything. Each progressive year, you learn more and discover you know less.

What’s your favorite website?
Wikipedia. I’ve wasted so much time learning about the most unrelated, random things that have nothing to do with my life – all in avoidance of my dissertation.

What’s the most unusual place you’ve had sex?
I feel like I must’ve done it in some weird places. Your readership might be disturbed. Probably on the side of a mountain is my most socially acceptable answer.

What position do you play in the big baseball game of life?
I’m probably the guy selling snow cones.

What’s your favorite food to splurge with?
Frozen yogurt. If someone were to give me a frozen yogurt machine, I would gain 400 pounds. There is no off switch.

What kind of animal would you be?
A mouse, or smaller. I would love to be able to crush my little body into an even tinier space.

What kind of plant would you be?
This may sound really gay, but lavender. It smells really good.

What are you most grateful for?
In general, friendship. I couldn’t live without other happy people.

What’s something you want more of?
Happiness.

State your life philosophy in 10 words or less.
Be kind.

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