Metro Weekly

Show us your amateur secret

If you're thinking about going to Secrets tonight, July 22, Cliff "Show Me" Witt has advice. "You don't need to bring a lot of clothes," he tells Hearsay.

Actually, Witt, the club's dance manager, wasn't strictly joking. He was speaking to those considering entering the club's monthly amateur night. Tonight marks the second edition of the contest. The first round last month proved to be as popular, even in its new, larger location, as it was in the old, original spot a few blocks away, where the stadium is now. "It's a very festive evening," says Witt, the club's dance manager. If you want to compete, you have to be prepared to get fully naked, and to dance for at least a couple minutes to local DJ tim-e's beats. Destiny B. Childs hosts the show where audience applause determines the winner.

All contestants receive free Andrew "Wait'll We Get Our Hanes" Christian underwear — "while supplies last," Witt adds. First prize earns $500, while the runners-up get a night or two to perform as a professional at Secrets — meaning, they get at least a night's worth of tips. "In my opinion that's better than first place," Witt says. And all contestants will be considered for future employment. "It's a good way to audition many all at one time," says Witt. "Usually the winner doesn't want to be a regular dancer. I don't know why that is."

In any case, the event is a great way for the average customer to see the future — or at least his next stalking victim. That's entertainment! Showtime is at 11 p.m, with final participant signup by no later than 10 p.m. Secrets is at 1924 Half St. SW. Cover is $5. Call 202-883-0670 or visit www.secretsdc.com.

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