America’s Got Talent — and Divas!
Hearsay was distraught when the clearly talented and vastly entertaining Diva League — Shi-Queeta-Lee, Ba’Naka, Akasha Cassadine and Jessica Spaulding with an assist from the X-Faction Dancers — who perform weekly at Town Danceboutique, failed to get chosen as one of the final 40 acts to advance into the show’s quarter finals. (Oh, yeah, but that little Billy Elliot clone — no problem, let’s just sail him through, he’s so cute and bland.) So imagine Hearsay’s tremendous surprise when, on last night’s show, a call to the AGT judges from executive producer Simon “Adios Abdul” Cowell forced the judges to reconsider as “wild cards” eight acts that had been dismissed, the Diva League among those. Two of the eight acts performed last night: the Diva League and Lake Houston Dance, a busload of dancing and pillow-fighting little girlies. How adorable. Gak.
"Tonight, we're gonna bring it," the Diva League cried out in unison before performing. The guys — er, girls — opted for a gothaholic, vampire-inspired motif, setting their performance to Rihanna's Disturbia. Crotchety judge Piers "The Darkness Is the Light" Morgan gonged in with a buzzer before the chorus, but both David "I’ve Got Cobwebs for Brains" Hasselhoff and Sharon "I Married a Rock God" Osbourne loved the "fabulously camp" production. You can watch the Diva League's entertaining performance below, but be forewarned, the imbecile in the control booth directing the camera angles clearly had no clue how showcase dance acts. To call the direction of America’s Got Talent appalling is an understatement. Half the time, the director cuts to the balcony to show us what it might look like if ants took to wearing costumes. Still, Hearsay enjoyed the vamped up Divas — call it a camp transfusion — and was especially impressed by Shi-Queeta-Lee’s classy, elegant restraint after Piers, in a crass, uncalled-for moment called the girls a “bunch of tired, old drag queens.” Somebody give that man an ass-whupping! Though Hearsay suspects Piers might enjoy an ass-plowing a little more.
Only five of last night's twelve acts will advance. So did the League bring it enough to wow the voting public? Well, Hearsay voted its allotted 10 times. (Cut ‘n Paste on the iPhone! Hooray for technology!) Hopefully tons of others did as well. We’ll have to tune in to NBC tonight at 9 p.m. to find out. Stay tuned…
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