Gay “Blue Power Ranger” suffered humiliating insults on set, ex-gay therapy, breakdown [video]
“I walked off set one day during the middle of lunch — half way through the day. I just made a decision. I’d been thinking about it for a week. And the reason I walked off is because I was called ‘faggot’ one too many times.
”So, I had just heard that several times while working on the show from creators, producers, writers, directors. It’s not that people can’t talk about me and have their opinion about me. But continuing to work in an environment like taht is really difficult.
”And I myself was struggling with who I was, or what I was. And to be made fun of on some level, or to be stereotyped, or put into a category and sort of saying … I’m not worthy of where I am because I’m a gay person. I’m not supposed to be an actor, and you can’t be a superhero…. I was kind of worried about my life. I was worried I might take my own life. For me to get a handle on what was going on, I had to leave the show.”
”Instead of learning to accept myself, I decided, ‘Well, I need to get rid of this. I need to get rid of being gay somehow.’ So, I did what they call ‘pray the gay away.’ Where you sort of believe that God’s gonna come down and somehow change you. And I spent a good two years trying to do that. And trying to change who I was….
”It eventually led to a nervous breakdown where I had to check into a hospital, and try to start rebuilding my life…. and start accepting who I was. I went to a hospital for five weeks, and sort of started dealing with things. And after I got out, I went to my dad to Mexico, and I was like, ‘Wow, it’s really pretty here….’ I will say that having a nervous breakdown is one of the most terrific things that I’ve ever had … and it frustrates me that I hated myself on such a level that I couldn’t accept myself….”
”I understand what it’s like to be beat up. I understand what it’s like to be called names. Me personally, I’ve been spit on. I’ve had food thrown at me. And I’ve had my life threatened simply because of who I am. And I know the humiliation and self-hatred that comes with that. So, my heart goes out to you [others with similar hardships]. And I wish I could hug you and tell you everything’s going to be okay.”
David Yost, 41, who portrayed Billy the Blue Ranger from the 1990s TV show phenomenon known as the “Mighty Morphin Power Rangers.” He adds that he wants others who feel similarly alone or suicidal becaus of their situation to contact a counselor at the Trevor Project. (No Pink Spandex)
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