Mature Discussion: Gen Silent (Review)
"Gen Silent" poignantly follows six elderly LGBT people trying to plan their futures
“The first nursing home, we weren’t really welcome there as a gay couple,” says Lawrence Johnson.
His partner, Alexandre, has Parkinson’s Dementia and needs care as his mind and body continue to deteriorate. Lawrence softly rubs lotion into Alexandre’s hands, something he would never have felt comfortable doing at the prior home. An intimate action, he feared it would cause problems for Alexandre’s care.
That fear, that small nugget of doubt that every LGBT person carries, is the crux behind Stu Maddux’s documentary, Gen Silent (
). Shot around the Boston Area between 2008 and 2009, it focuses on six LGBT seniors and how the fear of homophobia from health workers or services impacts their lives. LGBT people are more likely to remain independent — often long past the point where they require care — because they fear repercussions in the care system. “I worry about people who are hiding because they are scared to death,” says one care worker.
Gen Silent also poses that most terrifying of questions: Who will take care of us when we are older? For LGBT people, it isn’t as straightforward as one would hope, as family can be estranged and many gay couples don’t have children. If you need help, how do you carry on? It’s a depressing reality for many, Lawrence included. “I don’t know, when Alexandre dies, what I’m going to do,” he wonders aloud. “Why can’t I kill myself? There’s nobody in my life.”
It would be easy to criticize Gen Silent‘s shortcomings — the low visual quality, the overuse of soft focus, the occasionally awkward edit — but to do so diminishes its powerful message. As we meet various workers for LGBT elderly social and care programs, it’s impossible to not wish for more training, more action so that no elderly LGBT person need fear that they’ll be neglected in their old age.
Arguably the documentary’s most poignant subject is Khrysallis Anne. A Vietnam veteran, she lost her entire family when she came out as transgender. Now, with terminal lung cancer, she has no one to turn to. She tried a nursing facility (“They didn’t want to touch my body”), but now lives at home. Isolated, deteriorating, she longs for her family. “If they ever choose to catch up, before I die, I welcome them,” she says. Her lifeline is a network of LGBT volunteers, who rally to provide round-the-clock care for her. Unfortunately, a reconciliation attempt by her son fails to amount to anything and, with her cancer spreading, Krysallis remains alone.
“Being alone is really hard,” she gasps from the floor during her final video diary, her oxygen tank nearby, breathing labored. “It’s really hard. I’ve been through all kinds of shit in my life. I’ve been in Vietnam. Transitioning is hard. Losing my family is hard. But this shit — this is terrifying.”
As she struggles to sit up, she looks at the camera: “Just don’t let it happen to anyone you know.”
Gen Silent runs 63 minutes and is available to stream for free on Logo TV’s website. Visit logo.tv.
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